Some people think Sharon was withdrawing.

I think he was getting the friendlies inside the wire and clearing the free fire zone.

Friday Night Free For All

On tonight at Sir Humphry’s, byo fondu forks.

Worlds best JAFA Joke Competition

Yes thats right we’re making fun of JAFA’s as a public service.

Make your submissions and the ten best will be put on a T-shirt. Just the thing to wear in the next black out if you happen to be trapped in Auckland on your way to somewhere – anywhere that isn’t Jafaland.

I’ll get things started…

The Great JAFA Joke Shirt.

The electricty system

The water system (and they pay for it)

The Mayors they elect

The transport system

The road “system”

The tree ownership

Their funny little belief that they’re a “major international city”.

33% of the population 15% of the employment

The airport – which isn’t even in Auckland

I would have thought it would be the last thing they’d want.

Under floor heating in prisons within the law

Well ok then…

A little something from Dante & Sons heating specialists.

Meanwhile MOST New Zealanders could not afford such a luxury and many are still without bloody power to make it run anyway.

Another proud kiwi moment.

The People vs Helen Clark

And it’s getting personal.

Just out of interest how many New Zealand PMs have been on the receiving end of lawsuits for breaches of the Bill of Rights, the Constitution Act and the Public Finance Act?

I personally will be opening up MR Non-PC Don’t give rats arse who I offend Piggy Bank and slipping Mr Darton a couple of Ed’s. I suggest you drop by and help finance another step toward regime change in the Shire.
One day I’ll be able to say “see that smoking puddle on the ground, I helped pay for that”.

Liberal insanity in the Shire… for a change.

The problem…

Jarred James Hutchison
Charge 1: sexual violation Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 2: sexual violation Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

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Charge 10: sexual violation Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 11: sexual violation Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 12: sexual violation Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 13: sexual violation Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 14: sexual violation Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 15: sexual violation Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

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Charge 23: sexual violation Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 24: sexual violation Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 25: sexual violation Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 26: sexual violation Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 27: sexual violation Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

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Charge 30: sexual violation Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 31: sexual violation Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 32: sexual violation Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 33: sexual violation Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 34: sexual violation Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 35: sexual violation Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 36: sexual violation Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 37: sexual violation Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 38: sexual violation Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 39: sexual violation Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 40: sexual violation Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 41: sexual violation Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 42: sexual violation Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 43: sexual violation Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 44: sexual violation Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 45: sexual violation Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 46: sexual violation Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 47: sexual violation Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 48: sexual violation Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 49: sexual violation Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 50: sexual violation Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 51: sexual violation Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 52: rape Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 53: rape Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 54: rape Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 55: rape Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 56: rape Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 57: rape Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 58: rape Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 59: rape Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 60: rape Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 61: rape Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 62: rape Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 63: rape Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 64: rape Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 65: rape Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 66: rape Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

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Charge 74: rape Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge 75: rape Victim: Child aged 3 – 10 Verdict: GUILTY

Charge76: making objectionable material by filming the above offences Verdict: Guilty

Charge 77: making objectionable material by filming the above offences Verdict: Guilty

Charge 78: making objectionable material by filming the above offences Verdict: Guilty

Charge 79: making objectionable material by filming the above offences Verdict: Guilty

Charge 80: making objectionable material by filming the above offences Verdict: Guilty

Charge 81: making objectionable material by filming the above offences Verdict: Guilty

Charge 82: making objectionable material by filming the above offences Verdict: Guilty

Charge 83: making objectionable material by filming the above offences Verdict: Guilty

Charge 84: making objectionable material by filming the above offences Verdict: Guilty

Charge 85: making objectionable material by filming the above offences Verdict: Guilty

Charge 86: making objectionable material by filming the above offences Verdict: Guilty

Charge 87: making objectionable material by filming the above offences Verdict: Guilty

Charge 88: making objectionable material by filming the above offences Verdict: Guilty

Charge 89: making objectionable material by filming the above offences Verdict: Guilty

Charge 90: making objectionable material by filming the above offences Verdict: Guilty

Charge 91: making objectionable material by filming the above offences Verdict: Guilty

Solution A: 54 days on each offence under New Zealand’s system of concurrent sentencing. The two-for-one deal, or in this case NINETY ONE for one! Tell me what sort of a deterrent that is supposed to be.
Solution B:

Discuss.

Oswald Bastable

Liberal softcock.

Like a lot of us here in the Peoples Democratic Paradise of Lesbania he seems to be less than happy.

Last few weeks for cheap Gnome Homes!

Ok for all those people that have looked through the place and thought they might like to pick one or two up then I suggest you don’t delay.

Business is steady and the introductory discount is about to come off.

I know this will send some people into a tail spin of shock and horror but I am in business to make money and currently they are priced lower than what I can get for them. In short demand is good so I can make more money.

Possibly even enough to buy food!

In other news recent sales have led to donation of $12 to Project Valour-IT.

And finally if you live in Chirstchurch you should go to your nearest garden shop and ask for a Gnome Home. They’ll look at you like you’re mental but when they get hit with my marketing operation next week it will make so much more sense for them.

Go forth my winged simians! (And dress warmly)

Free Ballista Plans?

No.

Thanks for stopping by but I don’t spend six months developing, prototyping, testing and producing plans with the intention of giving them away.

I do however have plans in development that will be for sale as soon as I finish writting the instructions for them. At a mere $20 for hard a copy it’s extremely cheap. You see I do this for a living and $0:00/hour is just a little bit less than I can live on.

And no you will not be able to get them as downloadable files because I want to delay how long it will take for someone to pirate them and profit off my work. I’m really quite a prick like that, expecting to profit off my own work.

The trebuchet plans will be available by October and the ballista should be done in time for Chistmas.

UPDATE: Heres a free trebuchet plan for you. Read the post carefully.

UPDATE: Go here if you’re looking for a large ballista plan and want to answer some questions on the subject. Below are the links to the two files to build your own rubber band powered table top ballista. At present the free ballista plan has had well over 1,000 downloads and the donate button has been used a total of zero times. So, you’re welcome, but give some thought to actually flicking me a couple of bucks once in a while because I’m feeling not particulaly inspired to keep working for free.

table-top-ballista-plan

scratch-build-table-top-ballista

It’s Deja Vu All Over Again.

It's been 3 years since I am back, and Israel feels more and more like the US, not always in a good way. Yesterday there was a documentary on the state sponsored TV channel, that was set to examine the roots of the difficulties both generations of the Ethiopian Jews face in Israel. Examine it did, and guess what: it turns out that it is difficult to adjust to a culture radically different from the one you came from, especially when your new homeland has a share of its own objective difficulties, like relatively high unemployment (partially a consequence of decades of socialism modeled on the enlightened example of Western Europe).

So what to do? Worry not, IBA has it all figured out: we just have to face the fact that we are all racist, which, as we all know, is half of the solution. The rest is easy: we all just stop being racist pigs (which we are, Wikipedia says so), and we will all live in harmony ever after. Would you like fries with that?