Dear John

August 31, 2009

You have said that you will not repeal the most unpopular law in our nations history unless its shown that is not working as intended.

Ok, I dare you show us that it is working. Show me one child that has not been beaten and/or murdered because of this law. That was its intention, to protect children. Unless it had another intention that you haven’t told us about.

So show us John, show us this law does ANYTHING except criminalise parents for raising their children. I don;t give the slightest crap about you’re personally held convictions, its not your damn job to impose your personal convictions on us. You our bloody employee and we pay you to represent us, not dictate to us. If you feel that strongly at odds with nine out of ten of your employers, quit. Show us one single child that has been protected or quit, those are your options. Telling us what we think isn;t going to fly as we assumed you had learned from the last election. We didn’t vote for you, we fired Helen Clark for telling us what we think.

You’ve got two years left before we fire you.

Happy Birthday

August 31, 2009

to The White Mouse.

Fuck you John Key

August 27, 2009

A bill drawn today which would make it legal for parents to lightly smack their children will not have the Government’s support, the Prime Minister says.

The member’s bill, put up by ACT MP John Boscawen, was drawn from the ballot today.

The bill, which would make it legal for parents to lightly smack their children, has been in the ballot since March.

Its selection threatened to revive the divisive smacking debate just days after a referendum resoundingly backed the right of parents to smack.

But Mr Key today scotched any likelihood of the bill passing its first parliamentary vote by declaring National’s opposition.

You work for me, not the other way round. You’re out pal, good luck with the 12% who support your move.

Journalist sugests “climate change” not guilty of sinking islands.

August 24, 2009

We can expect a vacancy at ABC shortly no doubt.

It’s easy and tempting, when confronted with things we may not like, to blame someone else.

It means that you don’t have to face it yourself – no responsibility means no action is required.

Someone else caused it, someone else can fix it.

And that can lead to a dangerous kind of intellectual dependency.

Climate change is a case in point.

There’s a debate over global warming and sea level rise, but as far as most Pacific nations are concerned, whatever is happening to their coastline is sea level rise caused by western developed nations, and so countries like Australia and New Zealand can either wave a magic wand and fix it, or give them citizenship and let them flee rising sea levels for the bright lights of Auckland or Sydney.

But what if it isn’t caused by global warming, but more mundane things, like erosion caused by dredging,  coral sand compacting, what if the salinity in the water table is caused by increased populations using up more fresh water than ever before?

What if some of these challenges in fact are solvable, or at least can be adapted to with some local action?

Apprently someone missed the memo about the “science is settled” and Al Gore is God. Dammit this cheeky fellow even uses facts in his argument, thats not how the game is played!

Whats the difference between President Obama and Britney?

August 20, 2009

Not everyone has  seen Obamas a cunt yet.

Dear Britney

August 20, 2009

I have house plants that could produce a more coherent fiscal strategy than Obama.

Your other points have been considered and approved. Sugest you replace fiscal item with Whitehouse Topless Tuesdays (please vet your staff on this one though).

New Project.

August 18, 2009

Coming to a scene of utter devastation near you (if you live in Palmerston North) early 2010.


Yes it is to scale. The throwing arm is 6.6 metres long and its tip will be about 10.5 metres in the air. Primary ammunition will be bowling balls.

Because I can.

Tennis Ball Ballista -1 Wall – Nil

August 17, 2009

Once more a civilian told me that my machines would not be able to do something. And once again he was wrong, I was right. You can knock down a wall made of wooden bricks with tennis balls.

You just need to throw them hard enough and often enough. The sound of the wall coming down also wakes up the staff at the desk.


The plans are yours for only $10USD. Just saying.


A performance that will bring the house down (if you target a load bearing point.


Know what the difference is between a mechanical engineer and civil engineer?


The wall was actually shuted back quite away and holed several times before it went down. You can still see the curve from the dent.

Mechanical engineers build machines, civil engineers build targets for them. Someone else can rebuild the wall. Not my department.

Tennis Ball Ballista Plans now for sale.

August 12, 2009

The plans for the tennis ballista have now been proved and the machine is operating beyond expectations, so now you can get the revised version along with a photo rich set of instructions for the bargin basement price of $10 (thats US for the moment untill someone works out that Obamabucks are being printed on an HP2000 in his office)

Just keep in mind that what you do with it if you don’t follow my instructions is your fault. And I mean that in a very real and legally binding sense. Contact me directly to make a purchase. 22adartillery AT gmail DOT com


I can’t tell you what the effective range is for this thing but we’ve reduced a wall made of wooden bricks inside 150 hits at about 60′-70′ on the indoor range at the museum.

In other plans related news Tinys plan has been downloaded for free over $2,000 times now. With not one paypal donation so its user pays from now on. Shameless capitalism at work.

Sneak preview

August 7, 2009

Meet Vespasian…